Solar Eclipse: Moving on from 'not enough' land
We have a New Moon Solar Eclipse in Virgo today on the first day of Spring (Southern Hemisphere)/Autumn (Northern Hemisphere). It’s a perfect day to shift gears and get yourself moving onto a new train track where needed.
With this Solar Eclipse opposite Neptune, we might be confronted by something to do with the visions and dreams we have for our life. Some of our visions and dreams we intentionally ‘put out there’ or hope for, while others have always been inside us or come to us intuitively, showing us something that feels ‘meant’ for our future.
We always hear about the positive side of visions and dreams, how they inspire us and move us forward toward a desired goal. Millions of people seek out glimpses of what is to come to give them hope and direction, be it by getting a reading or using an intuitive tool. Yet there is another side to visions and dreams too. Depending on our personal wounds, beliefs and history, our visions and dreams can trigger feelings of lack, of “I’m not good enough to get there”, “I’m not good enough until I get there”, “I don’t have enough, I am a failure until I get/achieve/have xyz”, or “I’m not complete yet without abc.” Depending on our mental and emotional perspectives, our visions and dreams can spiral us into anxiety, doubt, despair and depression. We can fall into feeling “I can’t do it”, especially when the gap between here and there seems like an impossible journey.
As someone who has always had visions and glimpses of things in my future, I can definitely relate to this. As much as my visions have acted as a kind of a guide toward things my Soul wants to do this life, and lots of things have definitely come to pass, they have also generated feelings of ‘not happy yet’ when certain things are not here yet. It is one thing to be inspired by a vivid inner guidance system, it is another thing to have the manifestation of certain things not show up for years or decades…or ever (not yet or not at all, who knows).
Regardless of how much we have or how much we have achieved, if we have a vision that is so much ‘more’, (be it a better self, a greater life, a successful creative offering, a higher status job, more money, a bigger house, a more fair world), combined with a lens that paints our present as ‘not enough’, then we will have a tendency to walk around feeling unhappy and unfulfilled even when we reach certain milestones, as well as during the process of getting there.
Through life we tend to adopt either a glass half-full or half-empty philosophy. Sometimes we can consciously think we have a ‘glass half-full’ attitude to life, but our day to day feelings and experiences tell a different story. Regardless of our positive conscious thoughts, if our subconscious tapes are running ‘glass half empty’ songs, then it is that vibration that seeps its way into our feelings and life.
So, first lesson of this eclipse. If you know you have a glass half-empty issue going on, or your life is giving you clues that you do, adjust your lens right now. Feel into the difference between:
1. There is my dream job over there. I won’t feel like I’ve made it until I’ve got that job.
2. I know there is so much more out there for me to do and expand into. I’m really looking forward to that. Today though I am grateful for where I’m at now as this situation is giving me a really good foundation to step up from.
Adjust the words and topic to your own circumstances, and know this is not about just saying the words. It is much more about really feeling the difference between the two above perspectives. The first perspective feels very ambitious and go-getter, but for people with ‘lack’ as a core wound, it will only perpetuate lack and not allow the desired results. It will make you feel like you are holding your breath, waiting to exhale. This approach can be kind of like trying to get water in through a twisted hose. The second perspective is something people can shy away from, mistaking acceptance of the now as ‘giving up’, when actually acceptance opens up your energy to one of allowing, of letting in what is there waiting for you.
Imagine there is a hose above you that lets in whatever you truly need. If yours is twisted see it untwist and relax, allowing yourself to breathe in whatever you truly need, when you truly need it. Just as importantly, see this hose help you to breathe in healthy, abundant mental thoughts and emotional feelings, so that you can view everything around you right now with genuine appreciation and gratitude.
This Eclipse is in Virgo, known for its tendency toward perfection. This ties in so perfectly with what Neptune is triggering regarding the ‘I’m in not enough land’ theme. Perfectionists and visionaries alike can have a whip-yielding mentality toward themselves, where nothing is good enough because they can always see the vision of how something is supposed to look, or how they are supposed to be according to some self or society imposed expectation.
A perfectionist or vision-oriented person with a ‘not enough’ wound, might read perspective 1) above and think “What is wrong with that sentence? That is a perfectly normal way to think if you know what you are capable of!” Whipping ourselves to get to the next step or goal can become such an ingrained habit that we don’t even realise we are hurting ourselves. Thinking that focusing on ‘what we don’t have’ will push us forward to get what we want, may or may not give us our desired result. But it is an exhausting way to go about it. It drains and depletes us on every level.
If this has been an issue for you, challenge yourself to consciously tune into a different channel, channel number 2). The ‘I am grateful for this’ channel, the “I can see how this current situation is really creating a great foundation for me” channel, the ‘I feel very whole and fulfilled right now” channel. It is much much easier said than done, but an Eclipse can offer you the exact catalyst you need to help you shift gears.
The shadow side of perfectionism is that it can cripple us creatively and emotionally. We can fall into the habit of having our work, or our heart, never quite ready, never quite good enough, to be ‘out there’. Or we can act like we are putting ourselves out there, we can be doing all the ‘right’ things, but if facilitating thousands of Soul Sessions taught me anything (as well as my own life experience), it is that our inner energy overrides our outer actions all the time. If your legs are walking toward the green light, while your inner critic is chanting ‘you’re not good enough’, then somehow you find you never quite arrive at your green light. Or even if you do physically, your emotional body and thoughts don’t, completely affecting your enjoyment level of major accomplishments.
It was very revealing to listen to Bryce Dallas Howard being interviewed by Marie Forleo recently. Something she said has really stayed with me, and I think every person with a dream should know this. It so relates to this Eclipse opposite Neptune energy of today. Bryce comes from an acting family. When she decided to pursue acting, her grandmother told her something that would discourage most people but it ended up being the very thing that gave Bryce the strength and patience to keep going. Her grandmother told her that for every one acting job they got, the average working actor would have to go to 68 auditions.
It's actually a liberating thought to give yourself such a huge 'rejection allowance' number! Most people aren’t taught that rejection is ‘normal’. We assume it means we aren't good enough, or are in the wrong career entirely. Even when we do know that it is very normal in the creative arts biz, I don’t think I’ve ever heard a number like 68 being thrown around! I know for myself I feel so defeated after even just a few no's from magazine editors or potential agents. I can feel so disheartened when an online course isn't being done by lots of people. I love what I do, so I keep going, but it is always good to get that reminder that the fruits of our greatest visions don't just 'happen'. We have to keep showing up for ourselves, and for our dreams.
We often assume that successful people are that way because they are super talented, or got a lucky break, when in fact the majority all have stories like Bryce’s, including those outside the creative business. Success is usually a result of rejection after rejection, failure after failure, and you just keep showing up regardless. You show up because your dream, or your soul’s calling, or your heart’s desire can’t just go away.
So this Solar Eclipse in Virgo, opposite Neptune in Pisces, might confront you in some way, or it might prod you in an inspiring way. Neptune says “Here is your dream, your vision, your soul’s calling, it is here and not going away.” Virgo says “I am not asking you to be perfect, but I am asking you to move toward your dream like an artist or sculptor creates a work of art, or like a writer completes a novel. They do it with great patience. They do it sometimes excruciatingly slowly. But bottom line – they just do it. They show up. They take a step or two or twenty every day. They make mistakes, they get rejected, they fail, they keep showing up regardless.”
Neptune can also be about illusions, fantasy and delusions. So this Virgo Solar Eclipse is asking us to step up and match our physical steps with our ideals and dreams, rather than hide in daydreams then get frustrated as to why nothing is changing. Interestingly enough this is very similar to the recent Mars/Saturn message that was about taking action and looking at what is possible, what is do-able. This can relate to our personal lives, as well as the energy we contribute to the world. If you have been waiting for the world to change, have a think about how you want the world to change, and what you can do to help create that kind of a world. You hold one piece of a 7 billion piece jigsaw and your piece is as important, powerful and valuable as anyone else’s.
Neptune in some instances can also be about something hidden, so this Eclipse for some people will mean becoming aware of something you didn’t know about. Know that anything that happens on or around Eclipse time is a part of your destiny path, accelerating you forward. Better to be aware of something than not, no matter how painful as from there you are liberated to take action.
Well this was a long one, and if you are still with me thanks for reading to the end. Wishing you all a good New Moon and Solar Eclipse. It is a perfect night to light a candle, set your intentions for the month ahead, and say thank you for everything that is in your life right now.
(c) Dana Mrkich 2016
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